The Story of a Perfectionist Procrastinator

Aside from Co-Directing and Co-Producing my senior thesis film, I am currently in the process of writing a feature-length screenplay, my first ever. Up until this point, I've only written short films (roughly 10 pages) and one 20-page screenplay.

I've had my script idea for over two years and back in January I was incredibly thrilled to be giving time to actually writing out my feature. I started off by plotting out 35 beats, completely outlining my script. I even created a playlist (in order of beats) that went along with my script outline.

But now it's the middle of March and I'm burnt out from writing it and I am only 50 pages in. I know exactly what I want to happen and where I want to go, so don't get me wrong, I am still in love with my story and in love with my characters but, the task of writing an additional 50-60 pages seems like a dark cloud hanging over me.

Truthfully, I'm writing this blog instead of working on my script.

See, right now I just want to be revising it. I want my story to be written so that I can revise it so that I can start looking into either selling my script or trying to get it made.

I've been looking at "Writer's Block" tips and it turns out a large part of why I have been practically avoiding my script is because my perfectionism is killing me, slowly. I found an article, " 17 Signs Perfectionism Is Killing Your Writing Dreams," and funnily enough I identify with 12 of the signs.

I want my story to be perfect. It's a story that hits home and means a lot to me, and a perspective that I think doesn't get told enough - I'm asking a lot of this one script.

I've tried Blake Snyder's 48 minutes on / 12 minutes off writing rule, which I do find effective. But my main issue is starting the 48 minutes.

What if my pages are dull? What if I have to rewrite absolutely everything? What if the characters all sound the same? What if my dialogue sounds forced or fake? What if there's not enough conflict?

What if? What if? What if?

I know the solution is "simple." I just need to force myself to type. Something, anything.

I have something a lot of writers don't have, a story and characters that I love. I have the inspiration. I just need to force the motivation out of me and onto the pages.

I have five weeks left to write the rest of my script and to revise it before turning it in. So wish me luck!

Set Photo 5 (Summer 2017): I unfortunately do not have a picture from my Intermediate Directing film, "Threshold" so instead I will share a photo a few months after. This is on a trip with the American Pavilion where I got to hold Tom McCarthy's Sound Editing Oscar award.